Built-in-friends

I read a post by a blogging friend recently and she was writing about how she loves to see her kiddos love each other and be friends with each other. I so agree and had a glimpse of some sweet sibling loving yesterday. I am so blessed to have the precious children that God has entrusted to me. With HIS help, He gives me the words to encourage my girls to be each other's friend, with a goal that they will be friends for life. I also try to teach them that they need to be Ezzy's buddy and friend at all times too. They are very sweet and include him in many things, but there are times when little Owen has the most attention, understandabley so, but hard on my mommy heart...I want Ezzy to always be included, but there are times when the "tricks" Owen can do wins the attention of his big sisters. They are having so much fun enjoying all that Owen can do...milestones and fun baby things they don't see Ezzy doing. It is constantly a time of teaching how God made Ezzy different and special just for our family, all the while explaining that God has the power to heal Ezzy's brain, but we are content and satisfied with what Ezzy CAN do, BECAUSE of God's amazing power.

Having Ezra in our family has brought many precious opportunities to teach his big sisters the Sovereignty of God and how His ways are the BEST for us and we choose our attitude of the heart in response what He gives us. In a child's world of understanding, it is like teaching Gabby to be thankful for getting the purple cup instead of the pink one she wanted, a very watered down example, but in a kiddo's world that can be a BIG deal, any mom's of girlies can agree! :) Anyways, raising Ezra with the girls looking on, witnessing our heart's attitude and reaction to his little life, can be humbling and a HUGE task as we seek to glorify God in our attitude while training them to see GOD in the midst of the unknown future....the lessons of truly finding contentment in God's plan are countless. The simple lessons such as not getting the color cup they want are a training time, true, but because of the GIFT of Ezra in our family, the lessons at times go deeper into training them to truly have a heart of contentment and thankfulness.

It can be overwhelming and extrememly hard to have positive words to teach them, especially when they compare abilities with what Owen is able to do. In my own heart and relationship with God, He knows my heart and the longing I feel towards certain things...but HIS GRACE is sufficient and never-ending...because of HIM, can I talk to my precious daughters and teach them of the wonderful, caring character of God. And BECAUSE of raising a special needs child, God has given me priceless opportunities to teach His very attributes to them.

I thank the Lord for the privilege of raising sweet Ezzy, but some days I just wanna curl up and cry due to the constant balance of rejoicing in the development of little Owen and at the same time have his abilities reveal what big bro is unable to do...again, GOD alone is the only constant source of strength to walk in each day, praising HIM for the blessings He chooses to give me.

Like, I started earlier in this post, yesterday, I was blessed with a glimpse of fruit to all the teaching we have done with the girls. I was at a friends house visiting and the two children we were visiting were asking about Ezzy's braces, not sure what they were and why he had them. Ellie excitedly exclaimed, "Ezzy has NEW BRACES!....he was wearing casts and now he has these..." The excitment in her voice over the victory in Ezzy wearing braces came from a heart choosing an attitude of praise and joy even in the midst of him still wearing something on his little feet....it melted my heart and was a gift from God, making me smile at her precious heart of "showing off" her little brother. Both girls and I pray Owen one day, are wonderful siblings to Ez Man. He knows them and reacts to their voices and touch. He is a perfect fit in our family and I thank God for all He has taught me in raising Ezra.

Thank you God for the "built-in-friends" Ezra has in his life. For the precious bonds they hold as You have perfectly chosen Ezra to be their little brother and Owen's big bro. I thank You for opportunities to teach Your character and Word to them as they will grow up seeing first hand how we must choose to praise You, even in a "storm", knowing Your ways are the BEST, trusting You every step of the way. Thank you for all You teach me while raising them, how I am taught and humbled by their honest hearts of child like faith.

I love you God and thank You for Your endless blessings.

"Because Thy lovingkindness is better than life, My lips will praise Thee."

Psalm 63:3

I Am The Child

This was something that was read at a Special Needs Playgroup that I am a part of.
I am posting this for some other moms that I have "met" through the blogging world who also have a special needs child.
If you have not been blessed with a special needs child, but maybe know of a precious little one...read this with them in mind.
God is the giver of GOOD gifts...

I LOVE my disabled child, for WITH GOD, ALL things are ABLE! I THANK God for him, for Ezra has and continues to teach me daily... God has used him to teach me that my NEED for God is great and His GRACE is unending.

I Am The Child

(author unknown to me)

I am the child who cannot talk. You often pity me, I see it in your eyes. You wonder how much I am aware of. I see that as well. I am aware of much...whether you are happy or sad or fearful, patient or impatient, full of love and desire , or if you are just doing your duty by me. I marvel at your frustration, knowing mine to be far greater, for I cannot express myself or my needs as you do.

You cannot conceive my isolation, so complete it is at times. I do not gift you with clever conversation, cute remarks to be laughed over and repeated. I do not give you answers to your everyday questions, repsonses over my well being, sharing my needs, or comments about the world about me. I do not give you rewards as defined by the world's standards...great strides in development that you can credit yourself; I do not give you understanding as you know it.

What I give you is so much more valuable...I give you instead opportunities. Opportunities to discover the depth of your character, not mine; the depth of your love, your commitment, your patience, your abilities; the opportunity to explore your spirit more deeply than you imagined possible. I drive you further than you would ever go on your own, working harder, seeking answers to your many questions with no answers. I am the child who cannot talk.

I am the child who cannot walk. The world seems to pass me by. You see the longing in my eyes to get out of this chair, to run and play like other children. There is much you take for granted. I want the toys on the shelf, I need to go to the bathroom, oh I've dropped my fork again. I am dependant on you in these ways. My gift to you is to make your more aware of your great fortune, your healthy back and legs, your ability to do for yourself. Sometimes people appear not to notice me; I always notice them. I feel not so much envy as desire, desire to stand upright, to put one foot in front of the other, to be independent. I give you awareness. I am the child who cannot walk.

I am the child who is mentally impaired. I don't learn easily, if you judge me by the world's measuring stick, what I do know is infinite joy in simple things. I am not burdened as you are with the strifes and conflicts of a more complicated life. My gift to you is to grant you the freedom to enjoy things as a child, to teach you how much your arms around me mean, to give you love. I give you the gift of simplicity. I am the child who is mentally impaired.

I am the disabled child. I am your teacher, if you allow me, I will teach you what is really important in life. I will give you and teach you unconditional love. I gift you with my innocent trust, my dependency upon you. I teach you about how precious this life is and about not taking things for granted. I teach you about forgetting your own needs and desires and dreams. I teach you giving. Most of all I teach you hope and faith. I am the disabled child.

Me and my sweet boy...

God is so good and I thank Him for my son Ezra.

God has used Ezzy in my life to grow me, stretch me, and strengthen me... I am humbled and priveleged to be his mommy.

Thank you Lord for the blessing of grace you daily supply as I walk with You. May I rest in Your goodness and peace as I journey in raising Ezzy, beautifully created for Your glory, wonderfully testifying to Your power, and sweetly picturing your grace...

Thank you for the gift of his life You have entrusted to me.